Most of my blog posts have been on a serious note since my issues started in May. I thought I would make this one a more lighthearted post! In all the years Rita and myself have been competing we have had some crazy and sometimes nasty hotel experiences. Here are but a few of the best ones.
Wheeling, West Virginia. Mid-Atlantic States
We were staying in A Ramada Select…Select! Selectively shitty and old! We check in and get up to the room. Upon opening the door we are hit with the strong smell of mold…yummy. A 60-degree breeze also hits us as the door opens. It is freezing in the room! Not usually a big problem but as I am going to be standing naked being sprayed with an alcohol based freezing cold tan I was not happy. I call down to the desk, as there is just a grate in the wall churning out freezing cold air. No adjustment at all on this. The front desk attendants voice comes over the phone saying “just open up the window, the whole hotel is on air conditioning now! I was just thinking you have to be kidding me! I go over open the window and am greeted with the wonderful smell of exhaust fumes! Wonderful! So I opted to freeze rather than be asphyxiated! The other wonderment in comfort at the Ramada inn Select was the fire alarm going off oh every 30 min for 4 hours! YAY! Then I got to have my ass beat by Erik Fankhouser in the over all! J
Arnold Classic weekend
I judged the Arnold Amateur weekend the first year they had it. I thought the NPC was putting us up at the Court Yard for the weekend…WRONG! Just for Friday night. So I had to scramble and find a room 2 weeks before that is 12 miles away and a freaking Ramada Inn. The bed in the place looked like a banana. The heat sounded like a 747 taking off and it was just all and all shitty! Funny part was I complained and was given a free room via email but never got the email and they said I waited to long to reply!
Jr. USAs 2006
We are at an Embassy Suits. Beautiful hotel, awesome staff, great accommodations, wonderful weather… Wal-Mart right there for food. So you are asking what is the problem? I want to prefix this story with the fact that the staff there took great care of us in the end and we did not pay for 2 nights of our stay. So what was the trouble? The trouble was the large pizza sized puke patch between the mattress and box spring! Yeah that’s right…a freaking biohazard! YUCK! That was a WTF moment for sure! I went down and got the assistant manager of the hotel. He was a 30ish black guy, very nice man. I told him I had a biohazard in my room and he said what do you mean I told him just to come and see. I had the puke patch covered with a towel. He lifts the towel up and he sounded just like Chris Tucker and his eyes looked just like Chris Tucker’s as he yells “GODDAMN! THAT SHOULD HAVE BEEN DEALT WITH A LOOONG ASS TIME AGO!” (Why I mentioned he was a black guy so you could have the full visual.) I fucking cracked the fuck up! I told him that was my reaction as well. He was tripping on it. I told him not to worry too much as I knew the hotel was maxed out. When I went to check out I found they comped us 2 nights over the issue and that was more than fair to me. Embassy Suits is a class act!
2003 Jr. Nationals
I made the mistake of booking at a Travel Lodge. (Never do this!) The pictures must have been form when the fucking place was new. We arrive at the hotel and I think oh no! I get into the reception area and it is roasting hot. I ask the guy why the hell is it so hot in here? He says the Air was down. I said in the lobby and he said no the whole hotel. I asked him if he meant the rooms were this hot and he said yes. I had to tan Rita and sweating your ass off and tanning do not mix! He said to me he would give me $5 off a night! I laughed out loud and said forget it! 50% off would not work! Free would not work! He said you mean you are not staying?! All pissed off! I laughed again and left! And no he did not charge my card! We went to a very nice Holiday Inn Select that was $20 more a night and was awesome. We went back there 2 more times to compete at Jr. Nationals
These are just a few of the trials and tribulations we have gone through…more to come!
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